Grief & Loss

What is grief and Loss?

Loss and grief is when you lose something or someone very special to you, this could be your pet passing away, a family member or someone very special to you. Loss and grief can give a lot of people really intense feelings such as feeling overwhelmed with pain, anger or even numbness.

What is loss?

Loss can come into someone’s life in many ways and it can affect each person differently.One of the hardest and most difficult losses anyone will have to deal with is the death of someone really special and important to them.People might also experience loss and grief when:

1. The death of a loved one.

2. Parents or other special people in your life separating and getting divorced.

3. Being separated from a parent, both parents or a family member.

4. Being separated from friends our people in your community.

5. Moving away from home, or leaving the country.

6. If you are becoming really sick or watching someone else become really sick.

What is grief?

Grief is the feeling people experience after loss. When someone loses someone or something their life can be turned upside down and you can be thrown into chaos. This is because something you valued is gone and now your life seems different without them in it. Grief is the reaction to your loss and the desire to go back to your life the way it was. Remember that grief does affect everybody differently , some people don’t like to make a fuss and draw attention to themselves whereas other people let everyone know exactly how they are feeling. It is also important to consider that many different cultures and religions see death, loss and grief in many ways.  How someone will express their grief and loss will be in their way based on their own personal beliefs and  the way how they perceive the world. When people experience loss in their lives they go through reactions and feelings of grief that are different for everyone.

What do people Experience through loss and grief?

* Denial, shock or disbelief.

* So many questions that you try to find an answer for, then you try to make sense of your loss.

*Despair and anxiety because loss can be really scary

*You start to question/ think about  your future i.e… What will I do? How will I cope? etc..

*Anger, this can come from your other feelings like feeling abandoned, hurt or scared.

*Crying, depression, you might lose interest in your life- you don’t want to go out and you don’t want to see and do things that you normally do.

* Or on a more positive note you might accept and adjust yourself to this new life patterns, you realise that this is reality and it has happened so your pain doesn’t hurt as much.

What are the physical symptoms of Grief and Loss?

* Headaches

*Feeling sick

* Aching muscles

*Completely run down

*Lack of sleep.

*Tiredness.

*Having no energy at all.

*For some people they may find that they are more prone to sickness.

How can you deal with the death of someone?

Each person deals with death and the loss of someone in so many different ways below are some tips that could help you deal with someone’s death.

* You must accept your own feelings, no -one will feel what someone else feels when they lose someone, in the same way or with the same emotion and power.

* You should understand that what you are feeling is natural. If you want to cry let yourself cry, if you want to talk about your loss, then talk about it and if you want to have a laugh then laugh and celebrate the good times in their life.

* Let yourself feel what you are feeling, over time the feeling will pass.

*Don’t be afraid to express your feelings and talk to someone that you trust. You could write a letter, a song, a poem or even your journal. if you want paint, draw, sing, dance don’t be afraid to express you are feeling, your hurt, your fear and your loss.

* Reflect or talk about  the good and not so good times in that person’s life.

*Ceremonies, funerals, memorials are so important. They are an opportunity for a person to share their grief with other friends and family members. These special ceremonies can help accept a ending in your life.

What are ways to cope with grief?

There are ways to effectively cope with grief these can include:

1. Surround yourself with caring people, find relatives and friends who are familiar with your feelings of loss.

2. Express your feelings – tell others how you are feeling this will help you work through the grieving process.

3. Make sure that you take care of your own health, be sure to eat well and get lots of rest.

*Give yourself time to adjust your lost.

*You should be patient, it can take months or even years to accept and cope with a major loss and accept your now changed life.

*If you need to too, get support an outside help. If you know that you are not coping well with your grief you should seek professional help to help you work through your grief. Remember that it is a sign of strength and not a sign of weakness to get help.

 

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